Inside the London MBA

The Belle of the Winter Ball

So, I really should attend more social events here. There are quite a few of them. I have been going to about 50% of things. I mean, what can I say, putting up a 150-word blog once a month can be a full-time job. Anyways, I did go to the Winter Ball. And it was a lot of fun. The theme was James Bond and Casino Royale, and since I have had martinis in the past, I considered myself qualified to go. Everyone was dressed up and they had a poker tournament (one item of note is that in the actual book, they played baccarat and not poker). It was a great time. The thing is... great times like these require selfless people who are willing to put in a lot of work to plan -- to effectively receive nothing in return. Yes, I do work for LBS by posting blogs, but I get the line on the CV, the fan club, and job offers. For planning something that will adequately entertain over 300 people with live music, food, and drinks, somebody must put in a lot of work. For our class, that person is Hilary. She put in a lot of time to make sure that everything turned out perfectly. She also happens to be in my stream, and she consistently plans social events for our stream that are always fun. So much so that even I started showing up. So, if you are a prospective 2010 or beyond, you might want to think about what you can do to make your class as fun as possible. Maybe you can be the next Hilary.

Sidenotes:

1) I will be going to the annual Japan Trip in 3 weeks. I am very excited. Take full advantage of these wonderful trips when you are here.

2) I was asked by the Development Team to write a letter to Alumni panhandling for donations to help fuel the rock and roll lifestyle. I felt that it was about time to expand in to the print medium. I imagine that what comes next is global domination (from the Rupert Murdoch Guide to Life)

3) In May, there is a huge tournament called the MBAT, where numerous business schools compete in sporting events. It sounds like a lot of fun, but it will cost over 400 Pounds to go. I am considering either auctioning off my kidney or my body (whichever gets more money).

Moving On...

When girlfriends have dumped me in the past, I did all that I could really do... I moved on. So, as the milk round has ended for finance, I have now moved on. I was fortunate enough to get a job, so I am excited, but the experience was a humbling one altogether. I was told by one bank that I was too competitive, and yet not competitive enough by another bank. I like that this is an industry where the yin and yang between competition and collegiality is held at such a zen-like balance. As when girls dumped me in the past, I was also told that they didn't find me attractive enough, or they really didn't like that I was flirting with other banks. Recruiting is like dating, and an offer is like their way of saying, "I love you (for a limited time of 10 weeks)."

But this blog is about advice for 2010 and beyond and not necessarily my catharsis, so my advice boils down to this... Take the milk round in stride. Stay confident when rejected. Everyone will get a job. And the best way to get over rejection is to find a better looking bank and make the other banks jealous. Because in the end, revenge feels good too.

The Milk Round

So... vacation has ended (Italy was great though I am still getting feeling back in my neck after snowboarding), and we have now started Corporate Partners Week, or On-Campus Recruiting, or some even call it The Milk Round. This is the period when all of the big companies come to campus to peddle their wares and look for a lucky few interns for the summer. While there are many presentations, only a third of the class will actually get their summer associate positions through this process though many more than a third are trying very hard. So the following is what I have gleamed so far:

TOP FIVE THINGS I HAVE LEARNED AFTER TWO DAYS OF THE MILK ROUND

1) Everyone here thinks they are awesome. Most aren't. Most people are effectively the same exact person on paper -- graduated form university and spent 3 to 6 years working at a bank/consulting firm/random company. What you (as a current LBS applicant) can do now is... differentiate yourself as much as possible before you start school. Now is the time to compete in an Ironman Triathlon (Will) or start a charity that helps Malawi orphans avoid adoption by Madonna. Because really, being the 2009 Representative to the XY Club is not going to be that separating factor. I think most people will realize this soon when we all get rejected more often than a young American couple seeking a home loan.

2) If you have not been networking before The Milk Round, it is already too late. The networking sessions consist of over 150 students reeking of desperation surrounding approximately 5 to 10 company employees. They will likely not remember you from today. Nor is handing off somebody your business card the end game. They probably won't do anything with it unless they ask for it.

3) No groceries for the week. This is a week of free food. Don't do groceries this week. Save yourself that 10 pounds or 100 bucks. Every presentation comes with a bountiful supply of sandwiches. Some even have French macarons which are truly a tasty treat. Go for the hot trays first -- they will be in the most demand.

4) Figure out what you want to do before today. Every company sounds great in a presentation. They will seduce you with talk of their culture, their money, their free food (I might be more susceptible to the latter than most). Research properly what you are interested in before, otherwise you will end up interested in everything during the Milk Round.

5) When a banker asks you if you do modeling, he isn't asking you if you go down the catwalk. I was indeed flattered the first time I was asked before I politely responded that I am not tall enough to do that professionally. Apparently, you should learn how to model before the Milk Round as well.

That is what I have gotten so far. I would have a Top Ten list but the Hollywood Writer's Strike continues, and I can't come up with an extra 5. Peace to my brothers in Hollywood. If the Simpsons or Conan O"Brien needs writers, I am shockingly still unemployed after two days.

The Calm Before the Storm

You might be wondering where everybody has gone... Or maybe not. But if you are, November is apparently the busiest month of London Business School. I do not know if this is true for all business schools, but it is here. So, to cut the proverbial stress with a knife, the MBA Office has decided to offer a De-Stress Week. This week the following are being offered:

1) Free Massages
2) Chocolate Indulgences
3) British Breakfasts (By the way, is there anything in the British diet that is health conscious? -- I mean, I love clotted cream and scones as much as the next guy...)

So, this has been a surprisingly pleasant and relaxed week. Of course, next week involves the dreaded corporate finance midterm (not a final!). But I choose not to focus on that... I prefer to focus on my return to New York in December and my New Year's vacation in the Italian Alps. Have I made you jealous yet? Well, hopefully about everything except British breakfasts...

Do you want to work in New York?

Well, I think that I very well might want to work in New York someday, so I went on the London Business School New York Finance Trek this week. It was an excellent decision. Beyond being in the best food city in the world, I was able to visit 9 banks in 3 days with 8 other members of a motley crew led by our fearless leader, Lara. This trip was designed to enhance the reputation of the school in New York and hopefully gain employment for us as well. I also found out during this trip that London Business School truly has alumni located all over the world in many senior positions. It was a great opportunity to network and get to know these institutions better.

One thing that you may not know about B-School -- when the big companies come to visit the school, you often do not get to have prolonged discussions because there are so many people vying for their good graces. But we were a small group that was able to make real connections that will only help in the future.

On a side note, for those Americans coming to London Business School, shop as much as possible in New York before your arrival. I didn't realize how much I missed New York food and shopping before this week. Now, I get to go back to Tesco discount sandwiches.

Steve B

Steve Ballmer (CEO Microsoft) came to London Business School yesterday.  Well, technically the Royal College of Obstetrics and Gynecology, but we will let that slide.  He spoke to a full house that was eager to hear Steve Ballmer comment on vision, leadership, and Microsoft's goals for the future.  He also demonstrated a new product called Microsoft Surface.  I won't elaborate on that too much since I am not paid by Microsoft, well, yet...  Nonetheless, it was very cool and it was a great experience to be able to see a leader that you see in the news up close. It reminded me of back when I was at the University of California (who happen to be Nr 3 in College Football!!!). 

Anyways, Steve Ballmer only had time to take several questions at the end, but he encouraged us to send our follow-up questions to his Microsoft e-mail account, and I did.  And shockingly enough, he replied only four hours later.  He even answered my question.

GLAM

What is GLAM you may ask? A new David Bowie album, which would be a fairly decent follow to "Fame." Nope. It is the Global Leadership Assessment for Managers (known as GLAM henceforth). Effectively, it is London Business School's attempt to illustrate our weaknesses and strengths (if we have any). They also contract out to do a personality survey that tells us if we are ambitious or aimless, arrogant or modest, open or closed. Now, I like critical feedback as much as the next guy, but some of it is really harsh. I am apparently aimless, lack all sympathy towards other people, and untrusting. Now I know why all of my ex-girlfriends left me. Has GLAM been a success? It is very difficult to say. Maybe this is the kind of thing that can only be measured in many years when we are either effective or ineffective leaders.

The most fun part of it so far, however, has been a very well structured simulation where we had to run a small specialty motor company against other groups. We had to choose all of the variables from sales to marketing to R & D. It was an all day event, and I always love these strategic games that force people to make difficult high-level decisions. Unfortunately, they did not announce a winner since they said that the purpose was to practice group dynamics and leadership traits. But I am willing to declare my group the clear winner -- highest market share, highest revenue, and best press releases. Okay, so maybe I am not so aimless and closed, but maybe not so modest either.

Study Group Reality (aka I don't belong)

So, you probably know this already, but you will get a Study Group in Business School. Now, I heard all sorts of nightmares about these groups before I started school, but all in all, I have to say that I like my group. We are quite the diverse group of people -- The Russian-American math genius with a heart of gold; The Statistician who has heaps of experience at major credit agencies; The VP of a major bank; The Italian McKinsey consultant who looks (and I assume plays) like Kaka; and the Australian girl who has either been a model, actress, or basketball player in her previous life and also happens to be a great writer. And that brings us to me - No obvious talent. I think they put me there to motivate me (or to make them feel good), or to highlight that I bring nothing tangible to the group except a desire to Blog about them. It is like the quote in that classic film Rounders, "If you cant spot the sucker the first 30 minutes at the table, you are the sucker." In this case, however, replace the term "sucker" with "man with no discernible skills."

Shifting gears though ... speaking of poker... I have now joined the Poker Club, and it might be the best club at school. No, this club won't help you get great jobs like the Private Equity Club, but it sure is a lot of fun. I can't wait to invest more this weekend. I am also angling for a Senior VP role in the club -- gotta find something for my CV. Also, it should be noted that the President of the Poker Club also is a blogger though he has his own which you can find on the links to your left. It is called "Plausible Deniability." Whether the name is a legal defense or a life philosophy, I do not know for sure, but the blog is a must read if you are considering Business School, even if you don't really belong or have any talent like me.

Flying out to London

School starts in 7 days, and I cannot emphasize how nervous I am. I
am completely not ready for this. It feels like there are still a million
things to do, yet I can't think of them. First, I had to pack all of my
bags to fly to London (from New York). Now, one would think that a male with
no furniture to his name would not be able to fill 3 very large duffle bags
(each capable of holding a human body), but then one would be wrong. I
filled all three bags and 3 extra boxes to be shipped. I am ready for
anything. Interviews for great internships? Check. Clothes for
exploring the great pubs and clubs? Check. Tennis? Check. Cricket? Oh no, how
have I missed this?

Then, my roommates and I had to find an apartment. Actually, I had to
stay and work in New York, so my roommates took care of that. If there is
any advice that I can give to MBA 2010ers - outsourcing.

But I realize that I should relax. I will be at a pub tomorrow night
meeting all of my classmates, and many of them will have the same
thoughts that I have now, so we will be able to work through my phobias together
- but I bet they brought stuff for cricket.